Where I write for you some choice haikus about each Cardinals player
Oh not much happening here, fellow earthlings. St Louis is finally beginning to thaw out after a sloppy frozen slush ice catastrophe. To start out the year. The tone has been set for random, weird events. The ice storm has returned but further south, as if to say, St Louis was just practice for something even more bizarre. Louisiana and Georgia getting snowed on. Floridians facing highs of 52 degrees. And entire swaths of the country faced with weird weather, firestorms, and insanity.
So I need to lighten up. And to do that I am going to harken back to an old VEB tradition: writing haikus. Often about baseball. Or related to it. Somehow. Breaking it down into the 5-7-5. I am going to write haikus only for select players this time. I will revisit this and write a more comprehensive set of haikus after the season begins. (and maybe again after it ends)
Ryan Helsley
You came from out of
Nowhere are you as good as
Here in St Louis
Erick Fedde
I don’t yet know you
But you have arrived in a
Time of upheaval
Ryan Fernandez
Ryan Fernandez
Commander of the 5th Rule
Mustached bullpen ace
Sonny Gray
Starting rotation
Ace makes a sunny day when
Atop the mound, strikes
Matthew Liberatore
Longman sixth pitcher
Bullpen depth starter
Liberatore
Steven Matz
Man who is not there
Will he do anything while
Cardinal pitcher?
Michael McGreevy
Michael McGreevy
Future innings eater guy?
Too early to say
Miles Mikolas
Mustached Lizard King
Once a legend in Japan
Now: aged rotation
Andre Pallante
Andre Pallante
Mysterious Miracle
You may save our team
JoJo Romero
JoJo Romero
Has the personality
To compete, do it
Willson Contreras
Willson Contreras
Transitional year, first base
Competitive stance
Ivan Herrera
Ivan Herrera
Starting catcher now
Hitting is the key
Nolan Arenado
Defensive legend
Aging offensive player
Future hall of fame
Nolan Gorman
Powerful hitter
Discipline questionable
Will he recover?
Masyn Winn
Rising star player
He will be even better
Throwing arm elite
Alec Burleson
Alec Burleson
Designated the hitter
No defense, one trick pony
Lars Nootbaar
Fan favorite
Disciplined hitting, defense
Can he stay healthy?
Brendan Donovan
Utility man
He will hit and play defense
His hat will fall off
Michael Siani
The elite defense
Is rather enjoyable
Hitting, not so much
Hit shuffle and just know that you will never know what to expect next! https://music.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL17rF8twitIsjbjJ_IWuBMOxUIKTeyChK&si=mgyZ7qveMUb9skzU